Why You're Not Taking Action (even though you know what to do)

Everywhere you look there is someone promising “the answer” to your very specific problem.

We live in the era of information overload. There are 87 ways to approach your challenge, whether it's articles, podcasts, books, reels, freebies, mentorships, courses, or communities.

Yet so many of us remain stuck making decisions and moving our dreams forward.

The problem isn't usually that we don't know what to do, it’s that…

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We don't trust ourselves to figure it out

Ever been so excited about an idea that you decided to share it with a friend? 

And then that friend raises some concerns you hadn’t considered, or inadvertently talks you out of it? 

Or maybe you started working on a project and asked for advice on how to move forward, and the more people you asked, the more conflicting answers emerged, and suddenly you were more confused and burnt out than you were in the first place. 

Even though you were fired up and excited to take action, You’ve now decided that this idea just isn’t good enough, or that you’re not good enough… and another great idea dies before it ever sees the light of day. 

We don't trust ourselves to dive in and figure it out. To experiment and gather data. To create our own treasure map.

Instead, we believe there must be one correct way to do it, and surely that answer is going to come from someone else who knows more.

We convince ourselves everything would be easier if someone just gave us the very specific answer and step by step instructions.

Ever lost a few days in research, ideation, conversations with ChatGPT, and then felt too exhausted, indecisive, or overwhelmed to act on it?

If you have a creative brain (or identify with any form of neurodivergence) you probably know exactly what I'm talking about.

I want to double down on this point though: It’s not because your ideas aren’t good. 

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If it’s on your heart and it’s keeping you up at night, there's probably something there worth exploring.

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We’ve been conditioned to believe that more information will create certainty.

This, my friends, is a myth.

Information is helpful.

I've learned invaluable skills and made incredible connections through courses, communities, books, and mentors.

But eventually information stops becoming useful and starts becoming a hiding place.

A lot of us stay in learning mode because taking action means stepping into uncertainty.

And uncertainty feels uncomfortable.

You would not believe the number of ‘how to’ social media reels I’ve saved, and how many trainings I’ve joined. I’ve spent days making content that I’ve never even posted. 

My need for more information, combined with my perfectionism, is what keeps me stuck. The ‘how tos’ and trainings actually make the perfectionism worse, when the thing I often really need is to take messy action. 

Okay, so if more information isn't the answer, what is actually going on?

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The real barrier is emotional, not lack of knowledge.

Most meaningful decisions involve risk, and of course we humans are wired to avoid risk.

But we're no longer running from lions. (Although maybe don't test that theory on your next safari.) The risks we face now are usually emotional ones.

Maybe you're thinking about starting a business.

Sharing your passion project. 

Changing careers.

Ending a relationship.

Having a difficult conversation.

These decisions rarely suffer from a lack of information. In fact, you've probably already spent countless hours thinking about them.

You've weighed the pros and cons. You've imagined every possible outcome. You've sought advice. You've researched. You've thought about it some more.

The thing holding you back isn't usually knowledge.

It's fear of judgment.

Fear of failure.

Fear of regret.

Fear of disappointment.

Starting a business isn't scary because you don't know all the steps. It's scary because someone might watch you try and fail. 

When I decided I wanted to start coaching, I wasn’t afraid of taking the training or putting all the infrastructure together. I was afraid of what people might think. 

I was worried that everyone at my corporate job would think I was being “unrealistic,” or worse, that they’d think it was ‘flakey.’ I was worried they’d talk about me behind my back. 

When I really sat with this, I realized that if I was going to do anything I cared about in this life, then I was going to have to take action in spite of the fear.

No new information, advice, mastermind, or freebie is going to remove that emotional risk.

You can trust yourself AND be scared. In fact, the more it matters to you, the higher the degree of fear. 

Ugh, right?

Self-trust is believing you'll be okay even if the outcome isn't what you hoped for.

Which brings us to another misconception.

We assume confidence is a prerequisite for action.

This is why we keep learning, researching, and searching for answers outside ourselves. We assume more information will finally make us feel confident enough to begin.

Big misconception. HUGE.

Because confidence is actually a byproduct of action.

Self-trust matters far more than confidence. Self-trust is the willingness to take a step even when certainty isn't available.
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The people we admire didn't start out more confident than we are. And they weren't necessarily more certain either. They simply gathered evidence that they could handle whatever happened next.

And they gathered that evidence through action. 

By trying. 

By experimenting.

By getting it wrong sometimes.

By figuring it out as they went.

My best friend and I have a podcast called This Juicy Life. If you listen to our very first episode, you’ll know exactly what I mean. We actually recorded it twice thinking the second version would be better, but it’s impossible to start something new with the assumption that you’ll automatically have the confidence you earn with time.

We had the knowledge that messy action was exactly what we needed to do, but as perfectionists, I can’t tell you how agonizing those first few episodes felt. I second guessed nearly everything I said. Yet here we are, a few years and 100+ episodes later. 

Now we show up and figure out the episode as we go. That's the confidence I earned by trusting myself to handle the discomfort of taking messy, imperfect action. 

Which brings me to one final misconception.

We think we need clarity before we take action.

But action is often what creates clarity.

Imagine hearing about a mystical forest that has treasure buried somewhere deep inside. 

Other people have told you about similar forests, and they’re even willing to share their treasure maps with you.

But it’s not this exact forest. 

So you’re using their maps, and you’re imagining what this particular forest might look like and where the treasure might be…but you’ve never even entered the forest yet!

You can stand outside the forest for months studying maps. You can ask other people where they think the treasure might be. You can listen to podcasts about treasure hunting. You can buy the best equipment. You can even create a beautifully designed map.

But until you actually step into the forest, none of it really means much.

Once you're inside, everything changes.

You start spotting clues.

You notice landmarks.

You test theories.

You dig a few holes.

You discover what doesn't work. And eventually you begin creating a map based on your own experience.

The map doesn't come before the journey. The map is created because of the journey. 

We learn by doing, by getting our hands into the soil and trying things out. Action gives us data that thinking alone can’t.

And the more evidence you gather that you can figure things out, the more self-trust you build.

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So here's the truth:

I suspect you already know more than you give yourself credit for.

So the next step might not be to gather more information. 

It might be to trust yourself enough to take one imperfect, or inspired action in the direction of your goal.

Because the bridge between knowing and doing isn't certainty, confidence, or clarity…

It's self-trust.